I think about my new email account, wonder if any messages have come in. This is new for me. I didn't need it before. I love the mail. But having taken transience to a new level, I want to stay in touch with something.

And yet I'm here with my family. How much more in touch can I be? Who can be more important than that?

It's only been a couple of hours. We have a ways to go.

I think about the crew preparing to move north. I miss Lydia. She's like my other sister, someone to chide me and comfort me. And the Chief is like a replacement father. I moved away and gathered a new family to rely on. I've floated along on the current and let them steer me. I guess it's one way to live. But it's starting to feel lonely.

I set down my needles.

"I'm just going to walk down the hall."

"What do you need?"

"I just want to ask a question."

"What?"

"I'll be right back."

I'm lonely and I want to be alone. Yes, I'm a mess, but I'm walking down the corridor.